Good news, everyone!

March 31st, 2012 by The Doctor


What would you say if I told you that you don’t have to worry about your credit card debt or your mortgage anymore? Are you worried about losing your hair? Or your job? Or about your favourite band splitting up and them all embarking on embarassing solo careers?
Maybe you are worried about the irreversible loss of plant & animal species through human encroachment, or the pollution of the precious air and water?

Well you can just tip all your worries and cares about the future down the cosmic drain friends, because the good news is that soon we are all going to die.

The 1918 flu pandemic killed 100 million people. In only 12 months it spread across most of the world, all in an age before international air travel.
This flu strain had a mortality rate of only about 2%.

The Influenza virus A subtype H5N1 bird flu has a mortality rate of 75%, but is not transmissable between humans. Not until late last year when clever boffins at the Erasmus Medical Centre in The Netherlands and the University of Wisconson in the USĀ  both managed to engineer a so-called Super Bug strain that is airborne transmissable like the common cold.

So, soon enough, either through a lab accident or an intentional act, this lethal baby will be well amongst us and we will all be dropping like flies.
Wonderously, our little blue-green planet and its’ fragile ecological balance may be spared at the last hour by a massive pandemic that will probably kill most of us and cause the collapse of the poisonous global economy that is destroying our beautiful, unique earth.
Reason to celebrate, I say!

And party like it’s 1999!

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